Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Finding Our NEW Normal

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Finding Our NEW Normal

Something is happening in our family that hasn’t occurred in the entire 10 years that Jason and I have been together. I’m excited about it. He’s excited, but apprehensive, and the boys can’t fully wrap their heads around it. Jason will only be working one job!

Here’s some background. He’s worked his current full-time job our entire relationship and then helped his dad with a side business up until 4 years ago when he became a partner. Two years ago he bought his dad out and we’ve been running it like a full-time part-time job ever since. He’d work 40-60 hours at his main job and then another 20+ on the side.

We never saw him. He missed weekend wake-ups, nightly dinners, bath time and hearing all of the boys’ goofy stories. Weekend trips were just the kids and I because he had to work. He’d go days sometimes without seeing the boys and only seeing me for an hour or so before I fell asleep. He was tired all of the time and testy.

I got to the point where I became resentful. We didn’t NEED the money from the side business, my husband was just a workaholic, and that drive was causing him to miss so much. So after a long, hard and stressful week a couple months ago, he put an end date on the calendar.  His side business would be done.

As of today, it is. There are a few loose ends to tie up, but overall, we are done! I couldn’t be happier! The boys are adjusting, they keep asking on the weekends, “Why are you here daddy?” It makes me smile, but breaks my heart that that was all they’ve ever known.

There is a struggle though that I didn’t foresee. A recovering workaholic…..it’s a thing! We are having to make adjustments, and it’s hard. He needs projects and lists; something to keep his hands busy once he’s off for the day. On the weekends he can’t just hang out and relax, he goes crazy! Fishing is something he’s always enjoyed, and he’s finally gotten back into it. We run a lot of errands as a family, go to the farmer’s market, and took him to his first splash pad experience!

Photo credit: Tori Bruno Photography
He’s getting more time with the boys than ever before! I laugh when he gets frustrated by some of the things the boys do, but that don’t faze me, because to me it’s normal. There is the whining over what’s for dinner, the fighting over who goes potty first or the crying for mommy for every bump they get.




Layne learning man skills!
As many things that he finds  irritating, there are moments I’ve witnessed that warm my heart and am so happy to see! There are the endless amount of stories being read aloud while I cook dinner, living room wrestling matches, daddy/son fishing outings, and extra weekend naptime kisses.

Photo credit: Eric Francis Photography
Photo credit: Eric Francis Photography
Photo credit: Eric Francis Photography

Sunday will be six years we’ve been married, and we are celebrating it with a family camping trip. The man I married in 2010 is not the man I sleep next to at night in 2016. He’s more selfless, caring and gentle than ever before. Our marriage is growing as we learn to be around each other more. It seems crazy, but it’s like we are starting a new book in our life, not just a chapter. I look forward to see where this sequel leads! 

Photo credit: Tori Bruno Photography
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