Monday, March 14, 2016

An Ode To Formula Mamas

Recently I stirred up this major shit storm between some of my blog posts like Dear HatersWhy I Freed The Nipple, I'm Not Crunchy, Just Cheap and Lazy, and I'll Blame Breastfeeding, along with my "brelfies" on my Instagram. Because apparently breast vs. formula is like politics and everyone forms this hard line between what is "right" and what isn't. I've gotten some extremely negative comments based on what I've said about my choices, so let's be clear.

I write about my life and my experiences, currently; breastfeeding is my life. If I had started this blog when Layne or Kayden were babies, it would be about formula feeding. I've been on both sides of the coin. Choices as a mom are just that, choices. What is right for mom and baby is different for everyone. So for as much love as I give all of the nursing mamas out there, I want to give some love to the formula mamas as well!

Layne taking a bottle as a baby and totally loving it!

Dear Formula Mama,

You rock! I don't think society gives you the credit that you deserve. When someone use to ask me why my baby had formula, I would say that I failed at nursing. But in hindsight, I regret saying that at all. My baby had formula, because that was what was best for him and I both. Don't let other people's preconceived notions make you feel like you failed at anything! You are doing what is best for you and your baby!

Your financial commitment is commendable! It's liquid gold, because you worked your ass off for you to be able to provide that for your sweet babe! There's no shame in that game! And to the moms that have babies with allergies, my hat goes off to you! Your formula is more like liquid plattinum, because you could buy a new car with the cost of that!

You shouldn't feel guilty. I did for a long time though. I thought because I chose to give my baby formula I was somehow less of a mother. Other moms made me feel that way too. It took me a long time to realize that it didn't matter how my baby was fed, the fact was he had a full belly and that's all that really mattered.

All babies get sick. Every time Layne would get a cold or ear infection, I would tell myself that if I had still been nursing him he wouldn't have gotten sick. Guess what? Jayce has had more colds than Layne ever had in his life. So don't blame yourself if your baby gets the sniffles, I like to think of it as them working toward perfect attendance as a kindergarten with that strong immune system they are building!

You work hard too! Instead of pump parts, you have bottles to clean, and holy moly there are a lot of bottles. Moms who have never done bottles before don't understand that headache at all. Or the fact that when you want to take the baby out for the day, you stress about having enough bottles/water/formula for the time you will be gone. I remember being a hot mess on our way back from a road trip with Layne, praying he would sleep the last two hours of the trip. It was midnight and I only had enough formula in the car for an ounce size bottle. Luckily he slept!

Whether you gave formula straight from birth or later transitioned to it, you're doing some wonderful work! Keep your head up and be proud! You are keeping a baby happy and thriving and that is all that counts! Because let's be honest, no one requires your child to wear an ID badge to kindergarten stating how they were fed for the first year of their life!

Sincerely,
A Mom That's Been There


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15 comments:

  1. Love this! Whether you breastfed or not, you still did well by FEEDING your baby. That's all that matters. I support both. My daughter was breastfed for 8 months and supplemented with formula then strictly formula fed until a yr old. I don't think her being bf'ed mattered. She gets sick almost constantly and has multiple food allergies. Other than that, she's the happiest little 3 year old ever.

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  2. I ventured into it all, breastfed, used shield, pumped, formula... what it comes down to is exactly what you said, all in all the baby is getting fed. Love the line about the ID badge to kindergarten!! Great post, thank you for sharing!

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  3. I've breastfed, formula fed, and even had the allergy kid that was intolerant to everything except rice milk (blerk). I too am a big believer of as long as they're fed!

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    1. Oh allergies! How you mamas do it I don't know! Yay for being awesome!

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  4. Love this post! Of all three of my children, I have only been able to breastfeed one (my baby now). With my second I exclusively pumped and supplemented with formula, and my first was almost entirely on formula. I was made to feel AWFUL with those first two children - as if I were an inadequate mother for giving formula. It is ridiculous. Mothers should be supporting each other and remembering that keeping the child FED is what is important.

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    1. People are crumby :( Greaf job on being an awesome mama!

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  5. Ugh, you are so spot on! I felt a mountain of guilt when my son's allergies prevented us from breastfeeding. (Even now, I'm explaining that choice instead of just owning it). Thanks for writing this!!

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    1. It's crazy how we feel forced to justify our actions! Thanks for reading!

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  6. This is awesome! I pumped for my oldest for 6 months. I felt so guilty that I only pumped for 2 months with my little guy and switched to formula. In all honestly, it doesn't really matter. I was 100% a formula baby and I turned out fine! Great Post!

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    1. You pumping moms amaze me! I hate pumping! I'm a formula baby too!

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  7. THANK-YOU! I have been waiting for a post like this and was afraid to write one myself. Both breast feeding attempts were epic fails, including both births LOL. I wanted all natural and got all "emergency c-section:. But such is life right? We do our best and put our babes first, no matter what. Thanks for sharing :)

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    1. My births were "fails" too! C-section x2 here!

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  8. My oldest was mixed breastfeeding and formula. My youngest was exclusively breast fed because of what I learned with the oldest. This is a great post and SO true. Thanks for standing up for mamas :)

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