Saturday, July 18, 2015

Living 24 Hours at a Time

Greetings from the land of sleep deprivation and toddler hell!

5 hours of sleep looks great on Jayce!

I've been MIA lately. Honestly, the moments when I've actually had time to blog (those rare moments Jayce is sleeping somewhere besides in my arms) I've been doing mad dash cleaning. laundry, spending one-on-one time with the other boys or, wait for it......taking a shower and maybe a nap (although that's rare)!

I hear all the time at the grocery store and Target (the only places I regularly visit a week), "I don't know how you do it! You are a busy lady!" Well yes, I am busy. But what I do isn't any sort of miraculous feat, I do what I have to do and that is all. Let me be honest though, I lose my mother effin' mind on the daily! I've adopted a new mantra that I tell myself multiple times a day.

Live 24 hours at a time.

I can't look at the long term very often because honestly it scares the shit out of me. What are we doing next week? I don't know, we will see what happens when we get there. The only thing I know ahead of time are doctor appointments. But when I think really long term, we'll have at least 3 kids in sports/activities, homecomings and proms, driving, dating....ALL AT THE SAME TIME! Now that is scary as hell!

If I don't live 24 hours at a time I hold grudges on my kids, yeah it's a real thing. Monday I got slapped in the face twice at the library and my glasses ripped off while trying to be a cool mom and take them to superhero story time (thanks Kayden and Layne). Well my glasses are still crooked and if I didn't leave Monday when the "time expired," I'd still be pissed at them that every time I look down and my glasses fall off my face.

At times Kayden and Layne play nice together....for 30 seconds!
Jayce and I wouldn't be friends the day after he was attached my nipple for 24 hours straight during a growth spurt, but I forgave and moved on.

Dayton starts every day with a clean slate, despite him beating himself up all day and throwing a fit the ENTIRE day at school nearly every day for the last month. Even after he threw the biggest fit at the Durham museum during Railroad Days resulting in our entire time there being 25 minutes. The next day we started fresh.
In between screams, because he can't go outside. Pretty sure his jibberish he screams consists of, "Fuck you mom!"

Jason told me after bedtime on a day that was particularly rough for me, "Well, you made it through another day!" And that I did.

I really love my children , but with a newborn, two toddlers and an almost 6 year old that seems possessed at times, getting through the day is the biggest goal I can set.

This trying time when they're all little at the same time won't last very long in the grand scheme of things. I find myself constantly reminding myself of this. So if I can make it through this 24 hours, then tomorrow is full of possibilities!

To every new mom, soon-to-be mom, or anyone going through a hard time; live just in 24 hour increments. Every day will get better, even if it doesn't currently seem like it!

*This literally took me a week to write. As I sit here on the kitchen floor next to Jayce in the bouncy, I have Dayton thrashing around on the living room floor for reason unknown, Layne trying to take the DVD player apart, and Kayden just got done telling me that poop was coming out of his butt. #thisismyreality